Dog and Pony Show: FAQ

by Musiker

A hugely muscled human/dog hybrid gets to answer some FAQs about his awesome life in the adults-only Land of Eros Zoo, including daily activities, his sex life with his big, horsey lover, and just how lovingly their Master takes care of them.

Hi! Thank you so much for visiting the webpage for The Zoo at our adults-only theme park, Land of Eros! My name is Max! I’m a male dog-human blend; my coloring and bone structure are like a Swiss Mountain Dog, but my coat is very, very short, like a Boxer’s. I’m 6 feet, 10 inches tall (208 cm) and quite muscular, at 383 pounds (174 kg). My husband, Dale, is taller than me, and just as muscular, and even leaner, which makes him unbelievably sexy! He is a horse-human blend, patterned off of the Clydesdale draft horse. (Get it? His name is Dale! I think it was nice of Master not to name him Clyde.) He is bay with white hands and white socks from his knees all the way down to his giant hooves, a black mane and tail, and an adorable white stripe on his nose that I like to kiss.

I am deeply honored that thousands of adults come to visit me and the other exhibits each week, and though we don’t get to talk to you wonderful people very often, our attendants sure get a lot of questions! So Master has put together a list of the most frequently asked questions… and I get to answer them!! I did get some help from Master on a few of the facts and figures, but otherwise Master wanted all of this in my own words, except he says I have to watch my language. I am so honored!! Thank you, Master!

Respectfully, if you are not an adult, please go find a more family-friendly page!

Q: Are you happy here at the zoo?

Oh my goodness, I am so, so, so, soooooooooooooooo happy here!! Living in my wonderful exhibit with the man I love and getting to serve Master and doing shows for the guests and getting trained by the keepers and spending all day lifting weights and having sex makes me so happy! I reckon lots of guests are concerned for us like they would be for any animal they saw at a zoo, but please let me assure you, Dale and I are having a blast in here! I reckon you’ll see that as you read further.

Q: Do they take good care of you?

I’m so honored people ask this question so often, but oh my goodness, Master takes such good care of us here at the zoo. In case you haven’t visited the zoo yet, please let me tell you about how well they care for Dale and me and all the other exhibits!

First off, Dale and I live in one of seventeen habitats, and ours is quite spacious. We live in a 10,000 square foot (929 square meter) enclosure with a 5-story high roof that can be opened to let in lots of sunshine on a nice day. Like most of the habitats, ours is on a lower level than where the guests are, to allow for better viewing and to discourage them from trying to get in with us. There’s a viewing gallery along one side of our habitat so guests can sit and watch our shows (“The Dog and Pony Show”—I think that is such a clever name!), and also two more sides of our habitat have nothing but glass at guest level so people can look down and watch us as they walk by. The reason the roof is so high is because we do a lot of climbing and fixed and swinging trapeze in our act. (We don’t do the flying trapeze—our friends in The Forest habitat do more of that kind of thing and they’re incredible!) The trapeze can be lowered and raised by the keepers during the show, and yes, we do have a safety net to catch us if we fall.

Before we came to serve Master, if Dale and I could have seen the accommodations we have now in our exhibit, we would have thought it was a vision of heaven! One half of our enclosure is simply the best-equipped professional-grade weight lifting and acrobatics gym anyone could possibly imagine. We’ve got all the benches and bars and cable towers and trapeze and ropes and monkey bars and specialized equipment a professional bodybuilder or acrobat could possibly want. We even have dumbbells that go up to 300 pounds (136 kg). Our keepers train us to do all kinds of tricks to impress the guests, and they choreograph shows for us to perform. Often, our shows are athletic competitions between Dale and me, and the winner gets to top the loser as a reward, while the audience watches! That’s so great because I love winning and losing!

Speaking of which, a portion of our habitat is equipped with a huge variety of fun sex toys and gear and fetish-related stuff, and our keepers are constantly bringing in fun new gear for us to try! Last month Mister Jason brought me a vibrating butt plug and oh my gosh, I spent the entire day laughing and howling and cumming! So much fun!! If you come by our habitat and we’re not doing a show, be sure to check out what we’re up to, anyway! Dale and I get to service all the keepers any time they ask, as well as each other, so you might get to see some fun, steamy action!

Hidden behind one wall of our habitat are two privacy rooms, each equipped with a bigger-than-king-size bed. (Remember, we’re big boys!) The entrance to mine is decorated to look like a gigantic dog house, and Dale’s looks like a giant stable. And you know what’s cool? They have our names on the front!! We’re allowed to use our privacy rooms to get a few minutes out of view of the guests, but we’re not supposed to both go into privacy at the same time, and we’re not supposed to stay in for more than 30 minutes—the whole point is that we’re exhibits, after all. Usually, however, we use our privacy rooms when a keeper wants to have sex with us in private. Dale and I are never allowed to have sex in a privacy room without a keeper, because our sex is part of the attraction. We’re total exhibitionists, though, so that’s fine with us!

One corner of our habitat is kind of like a well-stocked bachelor pad, with a big TV and a video game machine and some super comfy leather couches and a huge, fuzzy rug for us to relax on. To one side is our watering trough and feeding area. There’s also our latrine, which is a large strip of lush grass with a comically giant fire hydrant at one end. And, yeah, I do pee on it sometimes, because it’s funny! I mean come on, dogs pee on fire hydrants, right? There’s also a smaller fire hydrant that’s secretly a bidet! LOL! This is also where we go to get bathed—we soap ourselves up and get hosed down while standing on the grass.

The latrine area is always kept very clean. Dale and I are expected to keep the rest of our habitat tidy, but the keepers are in charge of cleaning our latrine. They scoop our poop and wash off the grass as soon as we finish, and poop is never allowed to be part of our sex play. Even when we just have plain old butt sex, one of the keepers will hose us down thoroughly after. Master takes our health very seriously!

When it’s bed time, Dale and I usually just sleep wherever we finished having our last sex of the day. After hours, we’re allowed to use the privacy rooms for sleeping and sex, but we’re more likely to sleep on the rug by the TV or on the couches. OMG, I have the best life!

Q: Wait…a bidet? Don’t you miss toilet paper?

Nope! The bidet leaves me feeling clean and fresh. Toilet paper sucks.

Q: What do they feed you?

Oh! The food here is incredible! Each of us is on a carefully-researched meal plan specially designed for our individual human and non-human nutritional needs. So, like, Dale’s meals are usually a hot oatmeal mash with protein powders and fruit and grains and other stuff mixed in (he’s vegetarian now). I don’t think it looks very tasty, but that’s okay because Dale loves it so much he won’t share and always says, “What’s in my feed bag is mine!” If you try to talk to him while he’s eating he’ll just flip you off…but he’s mostly kidding. He also gets a hay-and-protein mixture in his manger that he can snack on during the day.

They usually fill my dog bowl with bits of chicken and rare steak mixed with rice and vegetables and this amazing gravy that’s made from I-don’t-know-what, but it’s amazing! And I get to snack on extra-large dog biscuits that they bake just for me! Plus, I don’t have to track my calories and macros and stuff, because our vet, Dr. Quanh, and our nutritionist, Miss Amy, keep track of all that. All I have to do is eat the deliciousness!

Q: What was it like to be transformed? Did it hurt? Have you ever regretted it?

That is such a great question! The answer is that none of us remembers his or her actual transformation because we were unconscious the whole time—and it was a long time. Master tells me my transformation took three and a half days, and it took me a full half-day to wake up, because Master wanted me to have time to acclimate to my new body. This is very kind of Master, because it would be excruciatingly painful if we went through the process awake.

Above all else, please know that both Dale and I have not once regretted our decision. That’s why the application process is so long, with so many opportunities to back out or be turned down. Master does not want anyone to regret the transformation, or the terms of payment.

Q: So, in exchange for the transformation, you become a slave?

Yep! I don’t receive pay for my labor, I am not at liberty to do anything—like, anything—without Master’s permission, and I have no legal rights as a human. Because I’m not a human anymore, at least not entirely! Technically, our legal rights have not yet been legislated or decided in a court of law. But none of us beast-folk plans to sue for rights because we all like being Master’s property.

I should definitely explain that we beast-folk regard our servitude as something completely different from other forms of slavery that have been practiced throughout history. That kind of slavery is wrong, no question. But we not only volunteered, we had to work very hard to earn our place with Master. He made sure we understood what we were getting into.

And Master has provided us one option to regain our freedom, and once a month we are reminded of that option when Officer Adobo visits. He’s a very nice retired police officer that Master hires to come check on us. He takes us to a private room with no recording devices and asks each of us if we’re content with our life, chats about how things are going, and does this little speech that all of us have heard so many times we can recite it from memory, explaining how to ask for emancipation and what it would entail. He’s so nice to us, and really cares that we’re being treated well.

The very last thing we are told to do before reporting for our transformation is to sell everything we own and put the money in a savings account, so we will be able to rent a place and look for a job if we do get emancipated. But emancipation would mean two things: being transformed back into a human, and leaving Master forever. All of us beast-folk see that as a horrible nightmare, so we just enjoy a nice chat with Officer Adobo each month, and give him a big goodbye hug. (In my case, at least—I’m a hugger.)

Q: How can you like being a slave?

Oh my goodness, there is so much to like! I do remember life as a free man, after all, and I don’t miss it. I earn no money, but that means I have no bills to pay. Master has pledged to ensure we’re taken care of when we’re older, so I don’t need to worry about retirement. I don’t have freedom to come and go as I please, but I don’t have to stress about freeway traffic or car breakdowns or getting mugged or running out of gas. I have a better home to live in than I ever did as a free man, and all the things I truly care about—Dale and Master and the keepers and lifting and great sex and performing for the guests—are all right where I am. I have no control over what foods I eat, but let’s be honest, I usually made pretty bad choices when it was up to me; now that I’m Master’s slave, Miss Amy feeds me the best tasting food in the world and my abs are ridiculously cobblestone-y. And Dr. Quanh is the best—she has degrees in human and veterinary medicine—and she only has 41 patients, so she sees me literally every week. The health care I get now is 1,000 times better than what I got when I was free.

I am not permitted contact with my family, but…well…that means they can’t contact me, and I’m happy about that. It helps that even if they saw me, they wouldn’t recognize me. I’m way huger and, you know, a lot more doggy.

I would not recommend this life for most people. Master is very selective of who he acquires, and the biggest reason why is that he knows most people would be terribly sad to lose their freedom. But for me personally, it’s a dream come true.

Q: Is there anything you don’t like about being a slave?

Hmmm. Punishments make me sad. I don’t get punished as often as Dale because he sometimes talks back to the keepers when he’s grumpy, but I’ve always been a pretty obedient guy so when I get punished I feel so much shame! When I do something wrong, like forgetting to rack my weights or wasting too much food, most often I have to spend an hour or two wearing The Cone, which is a giant plastic cone-shaped collar like the ones that keep dogs from licking a wound or something. I also have to wear the Chastity Cone around my genitals for sex punishments, like if I cum without permission. I hate the cones because everyone laughs at me, but what’s much worse is the constant reminder that I did a bad thing. I really, really want to be a good boy, not a bad dog.

Once I did a really bad thing. I forgot to call Mister Jason “sir”. It was just a mistake, but failing to show respect is a very serious matter, and I deserved the punishment I got. I had to wear both cones all day, but worse, Mister Jason had to give me a full-day time-out, and I had to watch Dale work out and do our shows all by himself while I got leashed next to the latrine. I’ve never cried so hard in my life. And I didn’t get to have any sex at all that day, so my balls hurt so bad I threw up. Mister Jason was sad too; even though he likes to dominate me and make me do embarrassing stuff, that’s all in good fun. He likes me and doesn’t want to punish me for real. And knowing that I made him sad made me cry even more.

So, I guess that’s a part of being a slave that I don’t like. But punishments are still important because they help us learn. I have never, ever forgotten to say “sir” or “miss” since then, so my punishment was helpful.

Hmmm. I guess there are a couple of friends from my old life that I wish I could stay in touch with. And once in a while I miss beer and certain foods that Dr. Quanh says are bad for me because I’m a dog now. But mostly I really hate punishments.

Q: You seem to be having fun when you do your shows. How much of that is acting?

The “having fun” part? totally not acting! Performing with Dale is the second-best part of my life here at the zoo, second only to all the great sex we get to have. We really love trash-talking each other and trying to out-flex each other and getting the audience riled up. There’s also something really meditative about doing a really complex trapeze routine or getting my form absolutely perfect on a heavy lift, and when I’ve done it just right I feel an immense amount of pride! But you know the best, best, BEST part? When the guests cheer and laugh and gasp and clap for us, it just keeps getting more and more and more fun!

There is a bit of acting in our shows. We pretend to not know what’s going to happen next, when in fact we’ve rehearsed our routines very thoroughly. And we really play up our competitiveness, so whichever of us “loses” our competition has to pretend he’s angry and disappointed, when really he’s looking forward to getting his butt plowed in front of hundreds of people.

Q: What do you do for recreation?

LOL, mostly sex. One of the enhancements Master gave us is a massive amount of sex drive and stamina. Also, both Dale and I can make ourselves erect at will, so we can pleasure our partners even when we’re spent. In exchange for this incredible gift, Master requires that Dale and I must entertain any keeper or senior staff member who asks. If we’re really lucky, we might have two, or three, or four people in here with us, and things get really exciting! There have been a few times I remember both of us getting spit-roasted at the same time and wow is that fun! All the beast-folk at the zoo perform sexual services for the staff; that’s one way Master is able to find such amazing people to work with us.

Each of us exhibits gets one day off per week. Dale and I get Thursdays off, and since it’s just the two of us in our habitat, they go ahead and close it entirely. Besides enjoying great sex with the staff and with each other, Dale and I lift weights in our free time, and play video games. Dale likes watching movies more than I do, and I like reading books more than he does. We eat and take naps. We snuggle. It’s nice to have a break, but by the end of our day off we’re already anxious to get back to training and performing.

Q: Just how much sex do you have in a day?

I had to ask Master to help me answer this one, and I learned something I never knew! Our keepers track all kinds of things on those tablet computers they carry around, and orgasms per day is one of the things they track! It’s because if we start having orgasms less often, they check our hormone levels and stress factors to make sure everything’s okay. I never knew they took that much care about our health!

Anyway, remember how I said Master amped up our libido and stamina? If you just count orgasms, I have an average of 6.8 per day. If you count oral, anal, and vaginal sex acts where I penetrate or am penetrated regardless of whether I cum, that’s around 8 to 10 per day. And if you include things like second and third rounds and rimming and eating people out and hand jobs and anything more fun than a French kiss? Wow, some days I get up over 20.

I love all the sex I have with all the keepers and staff. I love straight sex and gay sex as a top and as a bottom. But the best sex of all is when it’s just Dale and me. We can go at it as tenderly or as aggressively as we want without worrying about hurting anyone. We can worship each other’s enormous muscles, we can get into some really cool positions, and we can even do fun stuff like 69 on the trapeze! But mostly I love sex with Dale because I love him. I love him so, so much.

Q: With all the sex you have, what if you get someone pregnant?

Right, that’s a very serious concern. Before the transformation, Master explains to each of us that we will be sterilized as part of the transformation. He firmly believes that the only people who should be beast-folk are those who volunteer freely, and being born a beast-folk would mean that person had not had a choice. I think that’s how it should be. What if a baby born of two beast-folk or even a beast-folk and a human has all kinds of genetic problems or even dies from birth defects? And even if the baby was healthy, would Master force them to live at The Zoo, possibly against their will? Or let them loose to face a world that would almost certainly persecute them? That wouldn’t be right.

Q: What was the hardest thing to adjust to when you first woke up from your transformation?

Speech. My tongue is longer and more flexible than a human’s, which is another fun thing that makes me a really good sex partner, but I had to learn how to talk all over again! And I love to talk (just ask Dale!), so it was really hard to not be able to talk! I could sort of moan out what I wanted to say, but it was humiliatingly hard to understand me, and I drooled all over the place every time I said anything. Dale had trouble too, but he isn’t as chatty, so he didn’t get as frustrated.

I’m deeply grateful to say that Master hired a speech expert to coach us. I learned to kind of tuck the tip of my giant tongue behind my lower teeth and use the middle part of my tongue to make the consonants I used to make with the tip of my tongue. My s, sh, and th sounds still come out kind of lispy, and I tend to over-pronounce my lip consonants like p and b. It was hard to learn, and I still sound funny when I talk, but people understand me, and that’s what matters. My voice definitely sounds kind of “doggy”, like a mix between a human voice and a howl and a growl. Dale says I sound sexy when I talk!

I should also say that Dale and I were both pretty hilarious getting used to our new height and giant muscles. That first month we blundered around and hit our heads on things and crashed into stuff with our extra wide shoulders and even knocked each other down! Like, a lot!! If you could have seen us you would have laughed until you cried!

Q: How much choice were you given over how you were transformed?

When Dale and I came to ask Master to transform us, we both had one main thing in mind: we wanted the strongest, biggest, most muscular bodies we could get. We were also looking for a new life, each of us for separate but similar reasons, and whether you believe it or not, becoming Master’s property didn’t seem to be a very high price to pay.

So we both asked to be huge and strong with really big muscles and mentioned that we love lifting weights, and Master said he had an idea for a new habitat he would call “The Gym”, and that a pair of big, muscular males like we wanted to be would fit the bill nicely. He explained that all his exhibits must be blended with some kind of animal, and asked if we had any species preference. Dale wanted to be a bull, but Master already had a minotaur in The Labyrinth habitat. (Minos’s show is amazing, by the way—be sure to see him!)

Master felt that my friend’s quiet, hard-working personality might be better matched if he were to become a draft horse-human, and that appealed to Dale. I asked Master if I could be a friendly animal who likes people, because that’s definitely my personality, and that’s how I became a dog-human.

So, next Master asked us about our genitals. He knew that would be important to us; he’s so wise! Of course we bashfully admitted we wanted nice, big balls and penises and I turned to Dale—we were still human at this point—and said wouldn’t it be cool if we could get it up any time we wanted, even if we just came, and Master raised an eyebrow and said that was “intriguing”! He said he would give us big, meaty endowments, and make it so we could make ourselves hard at will, on the condition that we would be required to use our talents and equipment whenever we were asked. Talk about a no-brainer! And since then, Master has gone back and offered that enhancement to all the other males, so that means he really liked my idea!!

There were other things discussed as well, like breeds and coloration and stuff, but Master really took the time to ensure we were comfortable with the body we were going to be given by him. And we were, and here we are!

Q: It’s easy to see how you’ve been changed physically. What about mental changes?

Master did make some changes to our personalities. Mostly, he just amped up our positive qualities. Like, I’ve always been a rule-follower, a people person, an optimist, and someone who was eager to please. Those traits made Master immediately think I would make a good dog, and when he put the dogginess into me, those traits got intensified so that now I will do just about anything for a bit of praise. When a keeper pats me on the head and says I’m a good boy, I get a massive high! Seriously, it’s better than any drug you’ve ever tried!

Dale’s best qualities have always been his strong moral compass, his amazing work ethic, his quiet confidence, and his kindness and concern for others. Master amped all of that up. I am in awe of Dale’s focus and intensity when we’re working out and training for our shows, and he inspires me to work just as hard. He is more likely to question a policy or a keeper’s command if he thinks it’s unreasonable. (Usually he’s respectful about it…) He always keeps an eye on the guests in the gallery, and if he notices one who seems to be having difficulties he’ll call out right away for an attendant to go help them. And, well, he’s fiercely protective of me…which gives me all the warm fuzzies!

There are some other things Master did for us, mental-wise. All of us beast-folk are programmed with certain trigger words that instantly put us into a hypnotic state. Depending on which word is used, we may or may not recall what we did while we were in that state. This is useful for when we need certain medical procedures (Dale is squeamish, so they put him under for blood tests), for safety reasons (many of us are very strong, and the keepers can stop us instantly if we are at risk of hurting someone), and more stuff that I’ll talk about later on.

Master has blocked certain memories of identifying details from our pasts. I remember everything about my family and my life before my transformation, except exact names and addresses and stuff. I remember my Mom and would recognize her if I saw her in the viewing gallery (ha, not likely!), but I couldn’t tell you her name. I actually couldn’t even tell you my name from when I was free! I only know myself as Max. And though Dale and I were friends when we were free, I only know him as Dale. If we asked for our emancipation, Master assures us he could unblock those details so we would remember, but none of us is interested. It’s nice to have that separation from our old lives. Almost all of us had something unhappy in our old lives that we’d rather forget anyway.

Let’s see, what else? We all need to be pansexual in order to do what we do, and if we weren’t before we came to Master, it’s necessary for Master to modify us so we are. That wasn’t too hard for me because I was bisexual already, but it was a hard adjustment for Dale, who had been straight as a free man. But Master is so kind, he gave us a full month to acclimate to our new lives before we officially became exhibits, and during that time I was able to slowly introduce Dale to gay sex. Now he’s just as enthusiastic as me about every kind of sex, but it was rough for him at first.

I’m fascinated to notice that, although I got more obedient because I became a dog, most of the other beast-folk tell me that they didn’t notice getting more obedient from their transformations. What that tells me, is that Master wants us to serve him out of gratitude and love, and because he loves us fiercely and makes sure we’re treated well, not because we are programmed to obey.

Q: How much of your behavior is really like an animal’s?

Oh! Yeah! To be absolutely clear, I am just as much a dog as I am a human. So, like, when I’m really happy, my tail wags all on its own! I originally thought it would be something I could choose to do or not do, like waving my arm, but OMG, it just wags!! If I focus really hard I can get it to stop, but I really have to concentrate. And my tail tucks downward when Master or one of the keepers corrects me—not all the way between my legs, but you can definitely see it go down. Also, my ears perk up and sag down based on my emotions too!

My sense of smell is way better than a human’s, so for example I can tell exactly who is in the habitat without looking, because their scent tells me they are here. And although I sweat like a human, I also pant—with my tongue hanging out—when I’m very happy, when I’m overheated, or when I’ve been doing something strenuous. I also have some involuntary dog vocalizations. Like, when I’m very excited or something startles me, I bark—Dale loves to make me bark as a practical joke. And when I’m very sad or injured I whine like a dog, and on the rare occasion I get angry I growl.

But yes, I’m potty trained, LOL! And I like to think I’m a better lover than to just hump your leg…unless that’s what you’re into, haha! If it’s after hours we are allowed to eat at a table with knife and fork, but Master requires that when we’re visible to the public, we must eat like the animals we are. So Dale has a feed bag and a manager, and I have a giant dog bowl that the keepers fill for me to eat out of. It’s fun getting to eat without table manners and stuff, and my bowl even has my name printed right on the side, which is so cool! Dale and I actually prefer to eat out of bag and bowl instead of human-style. It’s easier because of the shape of our faces.

Master likes for us to show the world that we’re only half human. It’s part of the fun of visiting the zoo, for people to see that we are different and interesting. So we do our best to show them our animal side whenever we can!

Q: What do the keepers do?

Dale and I each have three keepers, though they’re all so nice that my keepers often work with Dale, and vice versa. My keepers’ names are Miss Maya, Mister Jason, and Mister Dante. Dale’s keepers are Mister Glenn, Mister Mike, and Miss Rachel. Other keepers come in to work with us from time to time, usually when one of our regular keepers is out sick, and they’re nice too.

All our keepers have maintenance duties, like making sure we’re fed six times a day, cleaning up after we poop, hosing us down after workouts or messy sex, stuff like that. All of us beast-folk are required to obey any keeper’s slightest suggestion as if it were an order directly from Master, must give them any kind of sex they ask for, and must address them with the appropriate honorific, like “sir” or “miss”.

Also, each keeper specializes in additional specific duties. For example, Miss Maya and Mister Glenn are in charge of our day-to-day grooming and physical and mental health. Since I don’t need much grooming because my fur is so short, Miss Maya helps with Dale’s grooming a lot. He often needs for his feathers (the hair that grows above his hooves) to be trimmed and combed. But Miss Maya especially likes to comb and braid his mane and tail, and even puts ribbons in them. The first time that happened I thought Dale would be insulted, but he loves the braiding and ribbons, and even asks for different colors for special occasions. I never thought Mr. Used-to-Be-Straight-Buff-Macho-Dude would be into getting his hair done! But man, does he strut around the habitat after Miss Maya’s done with him! I guess it’s a horse thing.

I’m sorry to say, Mister Glenn is our only keeper who never lets us service him, not even just a quick blow job. Dale offered once, and it was so clearly uncomfortable for the poor guy that we haven’t mentioned it since. He’s super kind, though, and we talk about all kinds of interesting things. Miss Maya does let us service her. She likes tender sex, usually in private, with lots of caressing and taking things nice and slow. It’s super relaxing.

Mister Jason and Mister Mike are our personal trainers. Believe it or not, Dale and I have actually gotten more muscular since our transformations, and that’s thanks to them. Remember those words of command that put us into a trance? Mister Jason and Mister Mike use those sometimes to push our workouts beyond the point where we think we can’t do any more. They always have to be super careful about safety, but this method is incredibly effective! When I wake up from one of those workouts, I’m always awed by what Mister Jason helped me accomplish. And Dale and I never hit plateaus in our training, thanks to those workouts.

When it’s not during our workouts, Mister Jason really likes to dominate me, and I love that so much! I mean, I’m 13 inches (33 cm) taller than him, and almost twice his weight, so when he makes me grovel and rides me around the habitat and makes me drink his pee and ties me to the gym equipment and stuff, it’s just so hot!! Mister Jason invented a game where he sets up an obstacle course and puts a dildo at the end. I have to run the obstacle course, lube up the dildo, and keep pushing it in my butt while I do the whole course in reverse. It’s challenging because I have to do things one-handed and I’m usually slippery from the lube, and if I haven’t cum by the time I get back to Mister Jason, I have to do the whole thing again, OMG! So you can bet that I’m shoving that thing in and out as much as I can while I’m climbing and crawling and jumping and running. Have you ever seen a dog doing agility and barking joyfully the whole way? Yeah, I bark and laugh the whole time because it’s so much fun!! Mister Dante even said he might make Agility Fetch part of my solo show! That would be so cool!!

Mister Mike is much more reserved than Mister Jason. He only ever wants a quick, private blow job, and strictly from Dale. He has excellent taste—Dale does give the best blow jobs in the history of blow jobs! Whoo, that tongue!

Mister Dante and Miss Rachel are our acrobatics trainers and choreographers. When Master acquired us, Dale and I had no acrobatics skills, but now we can do so many amazing things, thanks to our keeper-trainers! We have several different shows that we’ve learned, including a solo show for each of us for when the other guy is sick or punished. One of our regular shows really emphasizes feats of strength and bodybuilding poses. Mister Jason and Mister Mike help us do that show. But Mister Dante and Miss Rachel help us with our other shows. They’re such natural performers, and amazingly good at getting the audience excited and laughing.

Mister Dante and Miss Rachel are also the most likely of our trainers to want sexual services at the same time, and always out where the guests can watch. They both enjoy having Dale and me pound them, then they like to trade partners and make us immediately go again, sometimes for many rounds in many positions. Dale and I like to compete to see which of us can make his partner scream the loudest or orgasm soonest or whatever. It’s exhausting, but so much fun, and the guests love it!

Q: You’re very muscular. Do you use steroids?

Probably, though they never tell us so directly. Since the keepers can put us into trance and have us not remember what happened when we wake up, they could certainly inject us whenever they draw blood for tests. And putting drugs in our food would be simple. Dale and I did use steroids when we were free, so we’re both comfortable with the idea anyway. I doubt we’d get such good gains without steroids.

But here’s the thing: we’re not in any competitions (other than with each other), so it’s not like we’re “cheating” anyone. “Roid rage” is actually a myth based on a handful of guys who were jerks with or without drugs. And assuming they do give us steroids, Dr. Quanh can manage the side effects. And if we get really bad liver damage or something like that, Master can repair that too. So steroids in our case isn’t quite the serious business it would be for a regular human.

Q: Are you ever allowed to meet the other beast-folk at The Zoo?

Absolutely! During the slow season, the park opens later in the morning, so about three times a month Master hosts get-togethers for us in the audience gallery for the Atlantis habitat. He holds them there because our three mer-folk and Butch, our shark, can’t leave the water, though Rio and Pacifica, our male and female otters, can come mingle with us (Rio and Pacifica are the cutest couple!!).

My best friends among the beast-folk (not counting Dale) are Tess (female Border Collie), Mariah (female Arabian horse), Paco (male burro), and Pig (yeah, he’s a pig) from The Farm habitat. They sometimes sleep over in our habitat when theirs is getting deep-cleaned and that’s so much fun! We stay up really late watching movies and, you know…sex…

Q: What else should we know about beast-folk and life at The Zoo?

Wow, there’s so much I’d like to tell, but Master says I have to be selective. So I’ve thought about this one a lot.

I guess the most important thing is, please remember that although we’re not human, we are people. We form bonds, we think about complex ideas, we sorrow and rejoice. It’s okay to think of us as different and interesting and even exotic. That’s the deal when you are an exhibit in a zoo! But please don’t think of us as objects. Please don’t think of us as savages or uncivilized. We want you to enjoy your visit, but if treating us badly is how you plan to enjoy yourself, Master respectfully requests you visit somewhere else. (He gave me permission to write that.)

And after you visit, please look at your fellow human and see just how much you two have in common. See? No tail! No scales or claws or hooves! Is their skin color or faith or choice in lovers or the hole they pee out of really all you’re going to consider about them? In the end, that’s why Master created The Zoo, to show humans how not-different they truly are.

Thank you again for visiting our web page, and I really, really, really hope I get to see you in my gallery soon!

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