Therapy

by Sithspawn

Being a superhero can bring up many complications. So who do you go to for help?

“Chris, come on in. Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Hi Doc. Or should I call you James?”

“Whatever makes you most comfortable. Take a seat and we’ll get this session rolling.”

“Thanks Doc.”

“I must admit I was a little surprised to get your call, I usually deal with couples or family therapy, not one to one.”

“Yeah, I know but I’ve heard a few people mention you so I was hoping you’d be the guy to help me out.”

“I’ll try my best. You’re my last client of the day so if we run over a little I don’t mind. What can I help you with?”

“It’s hard to really say, I just feel like I’m being torn in two some days. You know how you have to be one way around some people and another way around others?”

“You mean like the difference between work and home?”

“Yeah like that. I’m sure you get clients where you want to say ‘what the hell is wrong with you?’ But as you’re at work you have to be more tactful, right?”

“I’ve never had it that extreme but I think I know what you mean.”

“Well that’s kinda how my life is at the moment. I’ve got some huge insecurities but I can’t tell anyone about them because no one would understand. At least here there’s a doctor/patient confidentiality thing between us isn’t there?”

“Absolutely, anything you say to me will be strictly between us unless I feel you’re likely to do harm to yourself or others.”

“That’s good then, thanks.”

“So what are these insecurities?”

“Well for a start off I always worry about how people see me and if I’m doing the right thing.”

“Are you worried about close friends or the wider world?”

“The wider world, in fact, the whole world.”

“Forgive me for sounding a bit like a stalker but I did a search for you after you contacted me last night and besides a few minor politicians, your name didn’t bring up any results that I would class as a celebrity.”

“Yeah… I’m not really a celebrity under my real name.”

“Ah, so it’s a screen name or another alias then?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

“So do you worry just about your alter ego, if you like, or your whole life?”

“The whole lot cos one affects the other. I’ve never, you know, been with anyone. I’ve always kept them at a distance to make sure they don’t get hurt. It’s just hard leading this double life if that’s what you want to call it.”

“Well what’s to stop you merging the two lives into one? Obviously both have to co-exist at the moment but maybe the public would be happier knowing the real you.”

“It’s not that easy, I’m not doing some face reveal in a video or something like that, if I divulge my private life then things will go crazy.”

“How so?”

“It’s hard to explain, I’d have to show you. Mind if I stand up?”

“Go ahead.”

“Try not to freak out, okay?”

“Don’t worry I don’t think you could show me anything I haven’t…oh my god!!! You’re him!!!”

“Doc relax! Keep it down.”

“But I never realised… Oh Jeez… You’re huge!! I mean you probably already know that, I just mean I’ve never seen anyone like you up close.”

“Doc… you’re babbling, take some deep breaths and try to relax.”

“Sorry, I should be more professional. I’ve just never met a superhero before, it’s pretty overwhelming.”

“And that’s where I have the problem. I can’t live a normal life like this. You treated me like a normal guy when you met me but as soon as my biceps resembled bowling balls you lost it.”

“I can’t apologise enough, I can see now why you feel you need to lead a double life. Does anyone else know about your secret identity?”

“My parents did but they died a few years back. I learned how to blend in when I was younger but I always wanted someone to share it with.”

“So why did you decide to share with me?”

“Honestly? I’ve kinda been spying on you for a while. I saw you a few months back when that tank went on the rampage downtown.”

“You mean the one you stopped by tearing it in half?”

“Yeah, that just felt like the easiest way to stop it. Anyway I saw you in the crowd and noticed you had a bit of a tent going.”

“Oh god!”

“Don’t sweat it, you weren’t the only one, but I thought you were kinda cute so I decided to keep tabs on you to see if I was right about you.”

“Right about what?”

“You being gay and having the hots for me.”

“Oh crap! Is that why you wanted to see me today? Why you picked me to be your therapist even though I don’t usually deal with individuals?”

“Yeah actually, I’ve been watching you for a while and I genuinely think you’re a nice guy, but I wasn’t sure how you’d react to meeting me in person.”

“Well now that I’ve had time to compose myself I think I can be professional again… oh jeez!!! Don’t bounce those like that you’ll set me off again!”

“Sorry Doc, I was just having a little fun with you. Want me to change back into Chris?”

“I think that might be better for now. Wow, that’s just as amazing in reverse. So what do you want from today’s session?”

“Well I was hoping for at least a date after this.”

“Don’t you think that would be a bit inappropriate? After all that would be crossing the doctor/patient boundaries.”

“Okay, well if you change your mind there’s an old military scrapyard full of decommissioned tanks and planes I like to play in sometimes, so that would’ve been my first choice for the date.”

“Holy shit!!”

“I’m serious though Doc, I think we’d be good together. I need someone to talk to sometimes to make sure I’m not screwing up. It’s hard when I have to do some heroic feats and then sit home alone wondering if I did the right thing.”

“So do you often feel like you handled something the wrong way?”

“Not always but the biggest problem I find with having these powers are there’s no instructions, does that make sense?”

“I’m not sure I understand, are you saying you activate some powers by accident?”

“Not so much that, I know how to make the powers work but where do you learn how to catch a falling plane without putting so much stress on it that it disintegrates? Or how do you fly with someone without going so high that they suffocate due to lack of oxygen? No offence Doc, but you normal folk are pretty fragile.”

“I think I see what you mean now, like in that bank robbery a few months back the robber died because he shot you.”

“Yeah like that! How was I to know the bullet would bounce off my chest and hit him in the face? But I agonised over that afterwards.”

“Okay, so what could you have done differently?”

“I don’t know, dodged out of the way? Melted the gun with heat vision?”

“So if you’d dodged the bullet it could’ve hit someone behind you or if you’d heated the gun up it could have exploded, or he could’ve dropped it and it still goes off killing or injuring him or someone else. There’s a lot of possibilities here but you did what you thought was best at the time.”

“I could’ve caught the bullet.”

“So why didn’t you?”

“I dunno, I thought it would just look cooler if it just bounced harmlessly off my pecs I guess.”

“Do you feel responsible for his death? From what I read of the story you told him not to fire but he still did. Anyone in this city knows you’re pretty much indestructible so he made a foolish choice and paid the ultimate price, that’s not really your fault.”

“I guess, but I still could’ve done things differently.”

“You know what they say, hindsight is a wonderful thing. If the same thing happened tomorrow you’d probably handle it differently wouldn’t you?”

“Yeah, I’d probably catch the bullet instead of trying to show off.”

“So do you feel the need to show off?”

“Kinda. I mean, when you have a body like this…”

“Oh Jesus!”

“Sorry Doc, guess I shoulda warned ya. Anyway, when bodybuilders look like this they wanna show it off, right?”

“Of course, although I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bodybuilder look as magnificent as you.”

“See that’s why I knew you were the right guy, you can appreciate this and also help me cope with the things that happen around me.”

“But it still means breaking the boundaries and I could lose my job.”

“Well how about you get rid of any record of this meeting and just say that we met somewhere else, then we can just be a couple and you just happen to ask me about my day.”

“I guess that could work.”

“And no one would know you were privately counselling a superhero anyway as you’d just be going out with Chris.”

“I think you’re onto something there.”

“Of course I am, no one needs to know about this side of me do they?”

“I guess not. So would I be the only one who knows about this side of you?”

“Yeah, I’ve never shared this with anyone else, that’s what’s made this life so lonely. I have friends as Chris but they don’t know my secret.”

“So you don’t trust them but you do trust me, even though you’ve only really known me a short while? What makes you think I won’t tell anyone?”

“What would you have to gain from it? A little money and some fame? Look what you’d lose.”

“Oh wow!”

“Exactly. Wanna come feel them?”

“My god, they’re huge. They’re like bowling balls, and I don’t just mean the size, they’re hard and unyielding too.”

“Yeah and check this out.”

“Damn!! With lats like that it’s no wonder you can fly, if you stood in front of the window you’d block the light out.”

“And if you notice I haven’t skipped leg day haha.”

“Holy shit! I know a few lumberjacks who’d want to try chopping those redwoods down.”

“That would be pretty cool, watching some guy ruin his chainsaw on these bad boys.”

“Mmphff.”

“Wow, now you’re the one taking me by surprise; that was one hell of a kiss.”

“I can’t believe that even your lips are strong.”

“Everything on me is strong, got a coin?”

“Sure, what’re you going to do with…what the…?”

“Aahhhhh.”

“Holy fuck! You can actually see the roof of your mouth embossed in it. And you did that with your tongue?”

“Told you everything was strong, wait ‘til we get to the junkyard and I get my dick out.”

“Okay this session’s over, let’s go.”

“You’re late.”

“Gimme a break, I was helping out at the homeless shelter.”

“Really? What were you doing, heating their food with your eyes?”

“Uh… tenderising their steaks?”

“Yeah right, if you hit a steak to tenderise it you’d smash it into atoms.”

“I can be gentle; I didn’t hear you complaining when I had your cock in my mouth last night.”

“That’s cos I was too terrified to move. I’ve heard of the mile-high club but that was just taking the piss.”

“Okay, I was late because I was fixing a surprise for you, now can we get on with this?”

“All right, I’ll let you off. So we decided to keep these sessions professional as you wanted to talk to me as a therapist, right?”

“Yeah, that way we can feel like we’re in a proper session rather than just being a couple talking. I know it seems weird but it kinda makes me feel better.”

“No problem, so do you want to do it as Chris or… oooookay we’re getting big. Wow, that never gets old.”

“Keep it together Doc.”

“I’ll try. So tell me what’s on your mind.”

“I’m still finding it hard to know how to use these powers, I mean it’s not like anyone can give me advice or anything.”

“Have you had any success in finding ideas on ways to use them?”

“Well I used to read a lot of comics and watch films a lot, sometimes I try ideas from those.”

“Like what?”

“Remember in that Superman film where he flew around the earth really fast to turn back time?”

“Uh huh.”

“Well, I tried that when my mom died.”

“Did it work?”

“No, it just made me really dizzy, and I smacked into a satellite which pissed off a Russian news station for a few days. Stop laughing! I thought you were trying to keep this professional!”

“Sorry, I was just trying to picture it.”

“Trust me you can’t. You know how in space there’s no noise? I was so disappointed when there wasn’t even a clang to tell me I’d hit it.”

“So what other things have you tried?”

“You ever see the bit where he crushed some coal and made a diamond? Didn’t work, I just got dirty hands.”

“I know there was a scene where he moved the moon to block out the sun, have you tried that?”

“I did think about it for a while but I’m sure it would mess up the tides or something like that so I’d have more to clear up. I think I could probably move it though, I still haven’t found an upper limit for my strength yet.”

“Have you actually been to the moon?”

“Yeah, it’s really boring and eerie. There’s no sound up there at all and it’s all just rocks and craters. Might as well just go to the Grand Canyon, at least you can make some echoes in there.”

“So what would you say is the worst thing about being you?”

“Being objectified I think. What was the first thing you thought when you saw me in this form?”

“Fuck me he’s huge!”

“See what I mean? You didn’t think anything like ‘I bet he’s a great guy’ or anything like that; you just saw the muscles and started drooling.”

“Well to be fair you do look incredible. Have you ever thought to use your looks to make money?”

“I’ve been offered loads of photoshoot opportunities and I probably could make a fortune but what would I do with the money? I can’t put it into a bank account as Chris because people would get suspicious. I don’t need loads of money to live so what would be the point? What would you do with lots of money?”

“I dunno; buy a big house, a few nice cars and things like that.”

“See, I don’t need that stuff. Why have a great house when you can live anywhere in the world for free? And cars, could you imagine me with road rage? Someone cuts me off and I’d just crush their car to the size of a pool ball and throw it into orbit.”

“Is that why you only have a modest apartment?”

“Yeah, that’s literally just a wardrobe for Chris’ clothes.”

“That’s interesting.”

“What?”

“You referred to Chris as if he’s a separate person, do you feel like you’re losing your humanity?”

“A bit, that’s why I really needed to talk this stuff over. I want to make sure I stay grounded and don’t go off on some ego trip.”

“Do you think that’s likely to happen?”

“I doubt it. Thing is, when I’m like this people are either afraid or in awe of me and it gets old you know? There’s only so many times you hear ‘You’re incredible’ or ‘You’re so big’ until it gets annoying.”

“So changing back into Chris is an escape from that?”

“Exactly! When I shrink down to this people don’t really pay much attention to me so I can do more normal things.”

“The thing I find strange is that you almost see yourself as two different people whereas I see both forms as two parts of the same whole.”

“Really?”

“Sure, your humanity and sense of humour from Chris make you a likeable hero, yet your self-doubt and vulnerability from worrying about your heroic deeds makes you a hero rather than being a cocksure asshole that would only do things for himself.”

“Wow, I never thought of it like that.”

“Although talking about yourself in the third person is a bit egotistical.”

“Right! For that I’m gonna get big again to watch you bone up. And there it is.”

“Asshole!!”

“That’s not very professional.”

Okay fine, let’s get back to being doctor and patient again.”

“Feels weird being called a patient.”

“Why? Have you never been sick?”

“Nope, which is lucky. Could you imagine if I had a cold? One sneeze and I’d cause a monsoon.”

“Do you ever worry about your powers hurting people?”

“All the time. If I land too hard I could cause an earthquake or if I’m using my heat vision and get distracted I could look the wrong way and really fuck something up.”

“Do you worry about me?”

“Of course. I really want to show off for you sometimes but I have to make sure you’re safe. Like last week in the junk yard, I made sure you were far enough away when you fired that shell from the tank so you didn’t get hurt by any shrapnel.”

“That was pretty amazing; you didn’t even get winded when that slammed into your abs.”

“Of course not, it’s only the same as a fly hitting into you as you walk along.”

“So have you ever felt pain?”

“Physical pain? No.”

“Only emotional when you lost your parents, right? So here’s a horrible, hypothetical question for you; what would happen if you lost me?”

“Damn you’re going right for the heart strings aren’t you? I don’t know what I’d do to be honest. I’d probably be mad and want to smash some stuff up so I’d most likely have to go to mars and make a few more craters or something.”

“So you’ve been to Mars?”

“Nah, the moon was crap so I just thought Mars would be red and crap, plus it’s a really long way away. It’d probably take a couple of days to get there and I’d get bored pretty quick on the way.”

“It’s a shame I can’t join you on these off-planet trips.”

“Yeah but that’s the thing, I want to share these amazing things with you but at the same time I want to feel human. I want to just go for a walk on the beach with you rather than holding back a tsunami.”

“Okay, but can I be selfish for a minute?”

“Go ahead.”

“Well like I said before, I see you as two halves of the same whole, I want to walk on the beach with you as well, but I also love that you can carve our names into a cliff with your fingernail. I love how you can take me to exotic places without worrying about passports or airfare and you telling me about the amazing things you’ve done in those places. I love you in both forms but I’ll admit seeing some of the shit you can do gets me really horny and I know that makes you bone up as well.”

“Speaking of which, I think we’ll need to take care of this pretty soon.”

“Not in here you won’t, you’re a great hero but a crap builder so I’d rather you didn’t take out any walls.”

“Okay then, I know a nice little place in Morocco.”

“Let’s go then.”

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